For those of you that know me
well, you will be aware of the fact that I much prefer wearing no clothes to
wearing any clothes. For those that don’t know me that well, this may be a new
revelation to you, but don’t go getting any weird ideas, it’s just a well known
fact that not wearing clothes is exponentially superior to wearing clothes. The
purpose of this little gem of information will become clear soon.
Depending on your level of
knowing me personally, you may also know that I like to complain about things.
And the weather seems to be a big point of complaint here in Mae Sot at the
moment amongst many people, so I feel it’s only appropriate that I jump on this
bandwagon. In the past few weeks, the weather here has changed significantly.
When I first got back, it was dry, searingly hot and, as I said back then, like
cycling into a hairdryer on full. It then became smoky. Oh so smoky. And the
hairdryer became filled with ash and dust, ensuring that any venturing outside
that was done left one covered in a fine layer of dusty, ashy grime, itchy eyes and a severly deminished ability to breathe. Then this weekend it rained. For the first time since October.
Rain here is not just a casual shower. It’s all or nothing. And the weather has
really put on a show in the past few days. There’s been thunder, particularly
impressive lightening, and monsoon rain with big, fat, instantly saturating
raindrops. This rain solidified my decision to get out of this place before
rainy season (more on that another day), I just can’t do it again.
You may think that with this rain
would come some respite from the oppressive heat. Not so my friends; not so.
Instead, the thick, wet air has upped the heat index significantly. Now, I have
always been particularly interested in weather and temperatures and barometers and
such. Thus, I shall tell you about the heat index (courtesy of our good friend
wikipedia):
The human body normally cools itself by perspiration, or sweating, which evaporates and carries heat away from the body. However, when the relative humidity is high, the evaporation rate is reduced, so heat is removed from the body at a lower rate, causing it to retain more heat than it would in dry air.”
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| Exhibit A |
So. This week, we have daily
forecasted temperatures of 35-38°C, scattered
thunderstorms, and a corresponding heat index of 48 degrees Celsius.
Forty-eight. That is a mere two degrees short of 50, and as I am sure you are
aware, 50 degrees is half way to boiling point. All this science talk aside, this
means that it is real super heaps hot x1,000,000 here. The hair dryer is now on
at full blast with a boiling (well, 50% boiling) kettle blowing its steam into
the funnel of aforementioned dryer. Hopefully this doesn't cause pulmonary edema or some such.
This brings us full circle. As
mentioned above, I am a no-clothes enthusiast. The nights don't even provide an escape from the heat anymore - imagine my dismay when I wake up
every morning in my 30ish degree room (yes, I have a thermometer on the wall)
and am forced to put on clothes. Well, this dismay would happen anywhere in the
world for me, but what makes it most painful here is that I must put on
conservative clothing. I refer you to Exhibit
A, a photo of me dressed for work this morning. Note the long skirt (side
note: this is my amazing Kansas skirt – it is the Sunflower State after all),
and the t-shirt (pretty risqué today actually – you can see a lot of chest).
Needless to say, these are hot items of clothing to be wearing in nearly 50 degree heat.
It has come to my
attention that the hottest places in the world also seem to be the most conservative, demanding the highest fabric:skin ratio. While Thailand itself ins't so conservative, Burma most certainly is. And here in little Burma, shoulders are scandalous, as are legs. Thus, singlets are out, as is anything above the knee.
I'm too hot to think of a good way to finish this. So I'll just leave you with this: it’s real hot.
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| Living in the end times |
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